desperate longings

i don't get it. i don't understand why things like the earthquake in haiti happen... i hate it. i hate that our world is devastated and tortured. these kind of days make me long for home even more and more. i was talking to God and thinking about these things last night... praising God that events like these make me want Him to return even more and redeem this world... but at the same time so sad that things like this even have to happen... or even being disappointed in myself for "needing" things like this to make me want God more... wanting to know what "the plan" is and yet knowing as we all want to know what is going on God is the one who directs our steps and the things that happen in our lives every day.

yesterday my sister called and said that her army unit was going to be sent to haiti sometime in the next few days... that made all the news a little bit more personal... knowing that she will be where all this destruction has taken place. i think about the things that are happening there and though it's kinda crazy and sad to have steph go not knowing when she'll be back and all... i think it is just exactly what God calls us to do as His people. the opportunity is crazy and unreal and all of a sudden, but when have we ever been asked to just sit around and respond when we feel like it. i am so proud of her and the people that are already there working to help people that are unable to do anything to help themselves. my heart is hurting for the people there and i just wish so much that we didn't live in a place where earthquakes devastate people who had nothing to begin with in the first place.

i feel my heart longing for Jesus. longing for Him to come back and make things perfect. longing for Him to once and for all take care of the effects that sin has had on us and this world.

"...creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed. for the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God. we know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. FOR IN THIS HOPE WE ARE SAVED." Romans 8:19-24